Equipment Needed
- Food processor or large zip-top bag and rolling pin (for crushing Doritos)
- Mixing bowls (medium and large)
- Baking sheet
- Parchment paper or silicone baking mat
- Small bowls for dredging
- Cookie scoop or tablespoon (for portioning)
Step-by-Step Instructions
I always start by dealing with the Doritos. I pour a whole family-sized bag into my food processor and pulse until I have fine, even crumbs. If you don’t have a processor, put them in a sturdy zip-top bag, press out the air, and roll a rolling pin over it until they’re crushed. I pour these vibrant orange crumbs into a shallow bowl and set them aside. Then, in a large mixing bowl, I combine the super-soft cream cheese, shredded cheddar, crumbled bacon, sliced green onions, garlic powder, and smoked paprika. I use a sturdy spatula to mix it all together until it’s completely uniform. The mixture will be thick, creamy, and speckled with bacon and green onion.
Now, it’s time to get my hands a little dirty. I line a baking sheet with parchment paper and set up my dredging station. In one small bowl, I whisk the two eggs until smooth. In another small bowl, I place the 1/4 cup of all-purpose flour. My bowl of Dorito crumbs is ready. Using a small cookie scoop or a tablespoon, I scoop out a portion of the cheese mixture. I roll it quickly between my palms to form a tight, smooth ball, about 1 to 1.5 inches in diameter. I’ve found that lightly damp hands prevent too much sticking.
The coating process is a three-step dance that ensures a perfect, non-leaky crust. First, I roll the cheese ball lightly in the flour, shaking off any excess. This dry layer helps the egg adhere. Next, I dip it into the beaten egg, rolling it to coat completely. Finally, I roll it in the crushed Doritos, pressing gently to get a thick, even coating of crumbs all over. I place each fully coated bomb on the prepared baking sheet. I repeat until all the cheese mixture is used, spacing the bombs about an inch apart. At this stage, they look like little, crumbly orange planets.(See the next page below to continue…)